Pacemakers

A physiology lesson: The heart contains these curious little nerve cells which spark the heart's intrinsic electrical conduction system. These cells set the basic heart rate, rhythm, and pace of our heartbeat and are aptly named, pacemaker cells. These pacemaker cells in the heart spontaneously fire, a unique cellular trait called automaticity. When pacemaker cells fire, they spurn an electrical charge to which the rest of our heart nerve cells respond. Cardiologists refer to this response by other heart nerve cells as capture. The nerve cells respond (capture) and electricity courses through the tissue, the heart muscle contracts, fills with blood, and the blood is pumped to the lungs to be oxygenated and to the rest of the body to give life. The blood that flows through us is the life force that carries the oxygen and food that nourish our body and allows us to live and move and breathe. If the pacemaker cells did not spontaneously generate a charge, the heart would not beat, the body would not live. However, because of the automaticity of heart cells, the heart will beat without input from the nervous system. This means that the heart will continue to beat, even outside the body, as long as its cells are alive. I love that, while it is generally understood that pacemaker cells slowly depolarize as ions pass through membrane channels, scientists still don't really understand how exactly pacemaker cells in our heart spontaneously generate an electrical charge. I like to give credit to God for starting the chain reaction that gives us life. I think that the impetus that causes our pacemaker cells to fire is the Godspark in us all...the breath of life.

So basically, the heart according to me:

• God breathes life into us
  
• then pacemaker cells spontaneously fire and send electricity through the heart
• electrical stimulation causes the heart muscle to contract
• heart muscle contraction fills the heart with blood
• blood gets oxygenated in the lungs
• oxygenated blood get ejected from the heart and feeds the body
• the fed and oxygenated body allows us to walk and talk and think and see and smile and create and....love

Sometimes things go awry with our hearts. Sometimes they fail to spontaneously fire. Sometimes they do spontaneously fire but the other nerve cells don't respond, they fail to capture the signal. They don't pick up what the pacemaker cells are putting down. This is called a heart block. When the pacemaker cells stop pacing or when they send out a signal too weak, or there is a heart block, a prosthetic electrical device can be implanted in order to artificially spark the heart. These electrical devices are called....well, pacemakers. They perform the function of the pacemaker cells when they fail to adequately do their job.

Lately I have been in a bit of a funk. I have somewhat isolated myself from my people and have spent a lot of time laying on my bed staring at the ceiling and listening to my own heart. And what does my heart say? Well, the normal "lub-dub, lub-dub, lub-dub" heart sounds speak to me a little differently these days - they say "look-up, look-up, look-up". Interestingly, this is the one thing that I am finding the hardest to do these days and yet, the most essential thing for my well-being. Whether or not I respond, even if I fail to capture His spark, God continues to breathe life into me, to speak to me, to beat my heart to His rhythm which says softly over and over again "Look-up, Look-up, Look-up".

When I look up, I look into God's eyes and see where my help comes from. I see the people specifically placed in my life who are my "pacemakers" when I have a heart block or I fail to capture God's electric lovespark. My world is filled with pacemakers, people who live their life in response to God's lovespark and generously pass it on to others. Thank you, wonderfully loving pacemakers. Thank you for the consistent phone calls. Thank you for not letting me isolate myself and stare at the ceiling too long. Thank you for taking me out for sushi and Thai food. Thank you for asking the tough questions. Thank you for walking slowly beside me as I hobble along. Thank you for not flinching or squirming when I get all weepy. Thank you for hanging in there with me as I wrestle with God and question the ways of this broken, lovely world. Thank you for sitting silently until I am ready to talk. Thank you for listening to me lament. Thank you for praying. Thank you for loving me wherever I am at. Thank you for all the many ways you all nourish my heart. Thank you, my pacemakers, for sparking. Thank you for generating new life.

I am most grateful.